13 People, 2 Robbers and 1 Depressed Girl

We have all had that one class that is an easy A. No matter what you do, the teacher will give you a good grade. On Thirteen Reasons Why this class is Peer Communications where the students talk about issues of society and discuss them. The teacher made them leave anonymous compliments on bags for each student. This notes were something you wouldn't say to someone's face and EVERYONE got at least one except for Hannah. She said on Cassette 4: Side A that she even got a new haircut and no one noticed. After leaving a note to herself, she saw Zach Dempsey steal the note from her bag and when she faced him Hannah was unable to say anything. Then Hannah, on Cassette 4: Side B, told the story about poetry and how Ryan Shaver stole her poem to put it on his newspaper. On top of that, she had left an anonymous note to the Peer Communications' teacher to talk about suicide. When the class began talking about it, they said many negative things about the idea of this person. Hannah felt more suicidal after those attacks. 

After all she had been through, Hannah started to feel depressed, lonely, but most of all, unable to trust. She said that she had a shield on every time someone talked to her.

"I can tell you this, at that table, the worst thoughts in the world first came into my head. It’s there that I first started to consider…to consider…a word that I still cannot say." (pg. 85)

In the end, we all know what Hannah Baker did. But what she said made me wonder about her decision of committing suicide. If her mind is made up, why can't Hannah still say the word that describes what she will do? I know that it is a big decision but after recording those tapes we can see that Hannah had been planning something past suicide. As if she wanted the people who hurt her to feel even worse. She was forcing them to know that they are blamed for a death. After all those things she did, why can't Hannah say "SUICIDE".

The Terry Wise Story: A Suicide Attempt Survivor

After looking over videos, I noticed how TRAPPED victims feel.

Hannah's poem that Ryan stole had a deeper meaning than what she said it meant.

Soul Alone
By Hannah Baker
I meet your eyes
you don’t even see me
You hardly respond
when I whisper
hello
Could be my soul mate
two kindred spirits
Maybe we’re not
I guess we’ll never
know
My own mother
you carried me in you
Now you see nothing
but what I wear
people ask you
how I am doing
You smile and nod
don’t let it end
there
Put me
underneath God’s sky and
know me
don’t just see me with your eyes
Take away
this mask of flesh and bone and
see me
for my soul alone   

When I read the poem I felt impacted by the last words, "See me for my soul alone". I think this was a way to beg for help. To show the world how she felt. Hannah wanted others to SEE that she felt lonely and didn't know who to talk to. I feel that Ryan should've seen this clue and instead of stealing her ideas, helped her or just left her alone.

There are only five names on the list to go. I cannot wait to finish this tragic novel. While reading these chapters I realized that the author, Jay Asher, is trying to teach us an important theme.

Help Others:  Help others every time you can instead of trying to hurt them.

You never know where someone's "snowball" is.

The snowball effect is something we should always keep in mind. "In 2013, there were 41,149 deaths by suicide in the United States." (Save Suicide Awareness) It is a really important situation that can become smaller if we all keep in mind that as little as an action may seem, you never know what it can lead to.

Works Cited

"Save. Suicide Awareness Voices of Education." SAVE. N.p., n.d. Web. 22 July 2015. <http://www.save.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.viewPage&page_id=705D5DF4-055B-F1EC-3F66462866FCB4E6>.

"Do Not Steal." Children's Bible Activities. N.p., n.d. Web. 24 July 2015. <http://sundayschoolzone.com/activity/do-not-steal-scripture-poster/>.

"The Terry Wise Story: A Suicide Attempt Survivor." YouTube. YouTube, n.d. Web. 24 July 2015. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlXRavVgxJY>.

"« »." Nothing Is Forever. N.p., n.d. Web. 24 July 2015. <http://nothingisforeverbaby.tumblr.com/post/3186189179/silence-is-a-girls-loudest-cry>.

".logo.filled .inner, .logo:hover .inner { Opacity: 1; Fill: Url(#rollover); }." Gif Snowball Effect. N.p., n.d. Web. 24 July 2015. <https://www.tumblr.com/search/gif+snowball+effect>.

".logo.filled .inner, .logo:hover .inner { Opacity: 1; Fill: Url(#rollover); }." Gif Explosion. N.p., n.d. Web. 24 July 2015. <https://www.tumblr.com/search/gif+explosion>.

13 REASONS To Feel Trapped

Clay Jensen was at Monet's listening attentively to the next tape. Cassette 2: side B.

T°y°l°e°r° D°o°w°n°, the, was the next name on Hannah Baker's list. The "society" of who she blames for her suicide. Tyler had been spying and taking pictures of her while she was at home. Afraid, Hannah and a "friend" from class went to Hannah's house to catch the Peeping Tom since they still didn't know who it was. After various attempts, someone ran away from under a bush.

Hannah described this as the time when her life became invaded at home.

On Cassette 3: side A we discover that the girl who helped Hannah see who spied on her was COURTNEY CRIMSON. The type of girl everyone loves for being so nice and becoming their friend. But Hannah said that it was just an act to use people.  They went to a party together but Courtney only needed her for the lift. To get back at her and the Peeping Tom, she made Tyler take a picture of her hugging Courtney. And just as Hannah expected, Courtney looked nervous and uncomfortable on the picture because she didn't want people to know they were "friends". Clay remembered this pictured being posted on the school paper.

Oh My Valentine was a tradition at school that had the purpose of finding the perfect soul mate. This tradition led Hannah to the next person on the list, Marcus Cooley. Hannah and Marcus went on a date to Rosie's because of Oh My Valentine. Hannah waited for around half an hour. He tried to kiss her and said things that offended her. Marcus left and someone from school went to check up on her but she was so angry that Hannah left the diner.




While Clay listened to Courtney's tape he went to Tyler's house. When he got there, Marcus Cooley handed him a rock and said he wasn't the first one to throw it at Tyler's window. After they talked for a while, Clay asked Marcus what he had done.

 "For a moment, his eyes stare through me. Then he blinks. “Nothing. It’s ridiculous,” he says. “I don’t belong on those tapes. Hannah just wanted an excuse to kill herself.” I let the rock drop onto the sidewalk. " (pg. 58)

When I read this I felt empathy towards Hannah. Marcus said that her story was an excuse. I think differently because people who struggle with suicide have their reasons. On Hannah's particular case, she has the theory of the "snowball effect" which means that a problem shows up and as tiny as it may be, another one comes along and little by little a enormous snowball forms. Suicide is not an excuse; it is caused by many things that are too big to handle for one person.

However, Hannah was trying for these thoughts to leave her mind. She wanted people to see that these rumors were not who she was.

" I wanted people to trust me, despite anything they’d heard. And more than that, I wanted them to know me. Not the stuff they thought they knew about me. No, the real me. I wanted them to get past the rumors." (pg. 71)

To me, Hannah could've solved this issue easily. I get confused because if Hannah says that she wants everyone to know her for her true self then why didn't Hannah do anything about it? All she has done until now has been making decisions that prove others that they are right about her. I think she should've talked to someone and stayed away from people who bring that side of her.

I think Hannah feels lost and all these little problems are making her feel trapped.

On the last few chapters I've noticed that Clay Jensen has a hard time hearing these tapes. But most of all, he usually remembers events of a party that he claims that Hannah and him met at. I think that Hannah is soon going to talk about this party and him. If Clay is so nervous about the tapes I think that he did something terrible. I cannot wait to read the next chapters of the story to finally figure out what happened with Clay and who else is on the list.

How I think Hannah is starting to feel.

"A Quitter" by Rasputina.

Works Cited

"Logo Design and Name Generator." Logo Design and Name Generator. N.p., n.d. Web. 22 July 2015. <http://www7.flamingtext.com/net-fu/jobs/24114676454737929.html>.

Valentines Day Wallpaper Images. N.p., n.d. Web. 22 July 2015. <http%3A%2F%2Fvalentinesdaywallpaperimages.com%2Fcgi-sys>.

"The Snow Ball Effect - We Are Reaching the Tipping Point - The Bitcoin Movement." The Bitcoin Movement. N.p., 27 Sept. 2014. Web. 22 July 2015. <http://thebitcoinmovement.com/snow-ball-effect-reaching-tipping-point/>.

"Rasputina - A Quitter." YouTube. YouTube, n.d. Web. 22 July 2015. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUepuuW7IDc>.

13 Minutes that Changed His Life

After school, Clay Jensen went home only to find a package that would change everything. At first, he was happy to open it until he played the first cassette. 7 cassettes and 13 slides of Hannah Baker's story, the girl who killed herself, of what led her to do what she did.

 This is how 

"Thirteen Reasons Why" begins. 

The story then tells that Clay listened to the side A of the first cassette. Hannah explained how it worked, there is a list of 13 people she blames for her ultimate decision that will get the tapes and a map that marks important places to go to so these people can understand more of Hannah's tragedy. She has only two rules;

• Number one: The ones from the list have to listen to all the tapes.
• Number two: They must send it to the next person on the story.

She warns that the tapes will be released to everyone if they don't pass them on.

 Something no one would like.

She then names the first person on her list, Justin Foley.

Justin was her first kiss and the story of what happened had been twisted so much that different kinds of rumors spread out through school. After the lies spread, Justin played along and never stood up for her.

After Clay heard side A he went to see Tony to borrow his Walkman but, because he didn’t know what to say, he stole it.

When he got home Clay played side B (now with the privacy of the Walkman) only to be relieved to know that the next name was Alex Standall. The story was that he made a list called WHO'S HOT/ WHO'S NOT that basically said that Hannah was somehow better than Jessica Davis. Then, when she was at her favorite candy store, "someone" she doesn't say the name just yet was inappropriate with her because of the list and the manager kicked him out.

Cassette 2: side A was interesting because the first girl appears, Jessica Davis. Hannah tells that they met through a teacher and after a while they became friends with Alex Standall and hanged out at Monet's until eventually they all stopped going. After the list came out, Jessica was jealous because she thought Alex liked her but instead it seemed like he liked Hannah. She invited Hannah to go to Monet's. After an intense discussion, Jessica scratched Hannah on the face. A scar was left right above her eyebrow that Hannah described as the daily "reminder" of what people thought of her.

Before Hannah committed suicide, there were two ways that other people saw her;

Either she was a bad person who used everyone (because of the rumors)

Or she was a troubled girl that needed everyone's sympathy.

But after she swallowed too many pills, people began to see her "TRUE COLORS" or at least, the ones from the list.

"I wish I'd never seen that box or the seven tapes inside it. Hitting Play that first time was easy. A piece of cake. I had no idea what I was about to hear. But this time, it's one of the most frightening things I've ever done.

I turn the volume down and press Play.

Hannah: number one: You listen. Number two: You pass it on. Hopefully neither one will be easy for you." (pg. 8, 9).

Through Clay, we can see the effect Hannah has on others by purposely sending these tapes. Her whole plan was that people felt either: terrified, angry, or scared. Specifically she said;  Hopefully neither one will be easy for you. This meant that she actually wishes the worst to the people getting these tapes. Clay himself feels frightened of the girl that he believed to be closest to perfection.

Later on, Hannah was desperate because during class everyone was looking at her and glancing at a paper. This was a list made by Alex Standall. Hannah felt criticized because she was on it...

" Jimmy’s desk groaned again as he sat back, and I knew Ms. Strumm was coming, but I had to find my name. I didn’t care why I was on the list. At the time, I don’t think I even cared which side of the list I was on. There’s just something about having everyone agree on something—something about you—that opens a cage of butterflies in your stomach." (pg. 20)

I can relate this to my personal life because I remember that there was a similar thing happening to me and a friend. Everyone was talking and asking questions during class and suddenly, a note fell on my desk. During the whole day everyone was talking about it. Getting the folded piece of paper meant that I was finally going to know what was happening. Similarly to Hannah, I didn't really care whether it was something good or bad. I just needed to know what everyone thought about me. Why they cared so much. When Hannah says "opens a cage of butterflies in your stomach." I felt the same way. 

This meant that the feeling of anxiety, rush, and nervousness all at the same time made me feel like there were a thousand butterflies flying in my belly; or as if there was a very deep hole that never ends in my stomach.

Up to now I think that the story has a very strong plot that makes me fly through the pages and finish them in no time. This idea that a dead girl can somehow stay alive made me think that this is a book I will enjoy. Thirteen reasons why manages to reveal and focus on two people's feelings, Clay and Hannah, while telling one emotional story.

After reading these chapters many questions rushed through my mind. The one I wonder most about is;

 Will Clay be next? And if it isn't him, who could it be?

I trust that the story will answer all my questions and hopefully, make me think of more.

Similarly, suicudal teens leave messages to tell their story. 

On this case, Amanda Todd.

Works Cited

"True Colors." Pinterest. N.p., n.d. Web. 25 June 2015. <https://www.pinterest.com/explore/colores-verdaderos-916200978377/>.

"Facebook Survey Scams Target Your Birthday #1." We Live Security RSS 20. N.p., 19 Jan. 2012. Web. 25 June 2015. <http://www.welivesecurity.com/2012/01/20/facebook-your-birthday-1-and-survey-scams/>.

"FULL VIDEO: Amanda Todd: Struggling, Bullying, Suicide, Self Harm, Fighting." YouTube. YouTube, n.d. Web. 25 June 2015. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyHX7wMJBY0>.